Major Houlihans Death
by R-chen
Summary: I know the title is intreasting but that is all I am gonna give ya! plz R&R! Some people my reconize it because it is an updated version of Mararet's confusing Nightmare!


Major Houlihan's Death

            **This morning started out as customary as any other at the 4077****th****. The cool morning breeze whipped and whistled through the camp and blew over signs. The sky was filled with the richest, whitest clouds Korea had ever seen. The beautiful display slumbered across the sky, blocking the sun's harsh rays from the camp's scorched surface. Throughout the day this kept the thermometer from reaching unbearable triple digits, and in due time the entire camp would slowly awaken.******

****

**The Swamp was a horrible scene of empty bottles and trash scattered about, the only two still asleep were Hawkeye and Trapper. One of Hawkeye's eyes began steadily open, then the other followed. There was a crackly voice that had began to draw closer from across the tent, "Hawk? Hawkeye you awake?" His eyes continued to open further and all he could see was a hazy view of what was left of the tent. Slowly raising his head to a slight elevation, his face twisted in pain and he was reminded of the party the night before. Just then he heard a loud "thump" only looking down to find Trapper situated on the floor next to his cot. "Trap you think you could be a little louder?  My head is pounding."******

**            "Yeah mine too, it feels like a jeep ran over it again and again." He whispered. Just as they both managed to get onto their feet Houlihan came busting in, throwing the door wide open. As she started to shout the two ducked their heads and covered their ears in pain. "YOU TWO ARE A DISCRASE TO THE ARMY AND I HAVE HAD IT. IN CASE YOU WERE NOT AWARE I AM WORKING ON A NEW PROGRAM AND I AM ALMOST DONE. WHEN THE GENERAL SEES HOW VALUABLE I AM YOU CAN BET THAT I WILL BE TRANSFERRED. I AM NOT THE ONLY PERSON YOU WILL BE MISSING IN O.R. COLONEL BUBBLE HEAD WILL NO LONGER BE CO. FRANK WILL BE IN CHARGE. ALL THANKS TO MY REPORT. WE WILL JUST SEE HOW LONG YOUR JOKES LAST NOW!"******

**            "Margaret what are you talking about, what did we do? All we ever try to do for this place is lighted the mood and have a little fun, you know make the war bearable."******

**            "WELL YOU HAVE GONE TO FAR WITH FRANK AND I!"******

**WOULD MAJOR MARGARET HOULIHAN PLEASE REPORT TO COLONEL BLAKE'S OFFICE AT ONCE, MAJOR HOULIHAN TO COLONEL BLAKES OFFICE******

**Just as the a announcement echoed over the camp she quickly turned, slinging her hair into Hawkeye's face and upon leaving she made sure the Swamp door slammed shut behind her. "Maybe the glue between Franks toes was a bit much."******

**            "Maybe so." Agreed Trapper in a face that spelled sarcasm. The two turned and looked at one another in amazement. Then they stepped outside the Swamp door looking around first before jogging after her and shouting for her to return. As Margaret entered colonel Blake's office Radar was leaned back in his chair reading a comic and did not even hear her come in. When he finally peaked over the top of the comic, her arms were crossed and she was giving him a glare. As quickly as he could he scrambled to his feet and slammed the comic shut on the desk top, while raising the other to his forehead in a form of a solute. "Where is Colonel bubble head?" She quickly demanded.******

**            "Uhhhhh, uhhhhh…well he is in post op." Just then the doors swung open and the two captains came in. "Margaret we are family we don't want to see you go please stay we promise we will try to treat Ferret Fac…I mean Frank better." Pleaded Hawkeye.******

**            "Too late captains, I must leave." Hawkeye continued to plead with Margaret when the Colonel came casually walking into his office and not much to his surprise the room was filled with screaming and arguing.  "Pierce, MacIntyre both of you out, now!" The two doctors squawked their final two cents worth and quietly left.  Margaret too simmered down now willing to listen to what Henry had to say. "Major as you are well aware of we here at the 4077****th**** are very proud of you and you mean a lot to us. However I just received a call from the 8063****rd**** and they can't wait to see your new program so that they can begin to install it. They have been up to their necks in wounded lately. So with that I promised them you would show it to them tomorrow."******

**            "But Colonel you know as well as me that I am not ready."******

**            "Well Margaret I know that if you set your mind to it and quiet squawking with those swamp rats you can be ready by tomorrow!"******

**            "Yes Sir." She said as she turned in the direction of the exit and left as quickly as possible, she knew that in order to be ready she must work as efficient as humanly possible. The night wore on and Margaret was still hard at it and when the early morning hours fell upon the camp a rust eaten jeep awaited Margaret outside her tent. About that time the door flew open and she stumbled out making her way into the drivers seat. It was quiet evident that sleep had been a stranger the night before. She had no more than driven a couple hundred feet from the camp when enemy shells pounded on her from every direction, as the shock set in from one of the shells exploding only feet away, Margaret jerked the wheel and lost control. The jeep went rolling and flipping furiously and Margaret was violently tossed into a bed of sharp rocks like a child's rag doll. She was not moving and she was covered in blood with cuts and marks all over her arms, legs, and face.******

**            Meanwhile back at the camp things were running fairly smooth, when the phone rang, "Colonel Blake phone call, from the 8063." Radar said as he entered the colonel's office. Colonel Blake picked up the phone, "Colonel Blake speaking."******

**            "Colonel what happened?"******

**            "Uhhh, sir I am not sure I follow." Blake said hesitantly.******

**            "What went wrong, Major Houlihan has not shown up!"******

**            "Are you sure? She left early this morning."******

**            "I am sure."******

**            "Well hold on a min…RADAR!"******

**            "Yes Colonel Blake, I saw Major Houlihan leave." Colonel Blake was in such disbelief that he hung up the phone with out realizing what he had just done. Radar had wondered off next to the phone, "RADAR PLACE A CALL TO GENERAL CLAYTON."******

**            "GENERAL CLAYTON IS ON THE PHONE." Radar blurted back.******

**            "General Clayton, Colonel Blake speaking."******

**            "What can I do for you Colonel Blake?"******

**            "Well you see one of my nurses is missing."******

**            "It is not Major Houlihan is it?"******

**            "I am afraid so."******

**            "What happened to her?"******

**            "Well General we don't know, she left for the 8063 this morning and has not been seen since."******

**            "I can't believe this! Place a call to Major Thomas, He can tell you if she has been found deceased. I sure hope this is a false alarm!" ******

**            "Thanks General, Bye." The Colonel said as he hung up the phone. Just then Radar handed Colonel Blake the phone once more, "Colonel Blake speaking"******

**            "Yes Colonel Blake this is Major Thomas."******

**            "Oh good I need to talk to you about one of my nurses."******

**            "What about her?"******

**            "Well you see she was on her way to another unit and she has not been seen since! We don't have a clue where she is, do you have any record of her, Major Margaret Houlihan."******

**            "You say Major Houlihan, Houlihan…I think I remember that name, ahhhh yes my sergeant came to me a few hours ago and reported a Houlihan was spotted laying impaled in a bed of rocks on the side of the road, next to her over turned jeep. But he could not stop to check on her because he was under heavy fire and did not have any way to transport her here. He just left to go back to get her body. "******

**            "Thanks for you information  Major, Bye." Colonel Blake dropped his head in sadness and he closed his eyes. As soon as he did he saw an image of Margaret, and in fact his mind told him that she wasn't coming back anytime soon. That is when the P.A. came on.******

**            ATTENTION MAJOR MARGARET HOULIHAN WAS KILLED THIS MORINING IN A JEEP ACCIDENT THE FENURAL WILL BE HELD IN THE COMPOUND WITHIN A FEW DAYS.******

**            Trapper and Hawkeye were in the mess tent when they found out. "I can't believe she is gone." He stated, breaking the silence. ******

**            "I think someone must be kidding us." Trapper added. ******

**            "No, there is nothing funny here, she is dead." Radar included in a sad voice as he sat down next to Trapper and Hawkeye. Just as the group looked out the tent's mesh walls they saw Major Burns running across the compound throwing a fit, he was crying and stomping his feet "WHY, WHY, WHY MAJOR HOULIHAN?" he belted out as he collapsed onto the compounds dirt surface.******

****

**Back on the road, Margaret continued to lie lifeless and helpless, finally she slowly started to awaken. But she quickly discovered the rocks just dug into her flesh deeper with each movement. Still she managed to pull herself off the jagged bed and onto the dusty road where her jeep continued to lie over turned, dented and a few chunks of green paint missing here and there. There was a bag not but resting a couple of feet away and so she again heaved herself over to it. She grabbed on to it, unlatching it carefully.  It was obvious that this was a medical bag, for when she looked in all she could see where gaze, bandage tape, and a cutting knife among various other medical materials. She pulled herself up off the ground, picking the bag up with her and began to limp down the road. As she walked she could hear the clatter of the dog tags around her neck, glancing down she grabbed hold of them, "Major Margaret Houlihan" she read aloud. Still a bit confused Margaret let the tags of free from her sweaty hand and kept limping down the rough road. After a few more painful minutes she stumbled upon a small Korean village. Looking ahead into a crowd she noticed a woman who looked to be signaling her closer, Margaret continued to walk, not sure where she was going. As she followed the Koran she began to think, "****Maybe this woman knows me and is taking me home or maybe I…no I bet she is taking me home, I mean I must live close to here." **** Margaret was excited because she was going home, and she could hardly contain herself. Still she had trouble walking with her wounds but she managed to follow the woman for several miles. That is when they came upon wooden shack that was buried in the scenery, the Korean went in and waved Margaret in behind her. So she carefully stepped in looking around she noticed there were at least a dozen children scattered about. They were playing and climbing on everything. Margaret sat down next to the far wall, leaning her back against it. When one of the kids dressed in rags came over to her and jumped in her lap. Surprised, Margaret wrapped her arms around the child and started to hum a song. Quickly Margaret was asleep, and so was the child.  ******

****

**"MARGARET! YOU'RE ALIVE!" Frank said with joy as he sprinted up to her and wrapped his arms around her. They continued to hug until Margaret saw a blurred image of a man standing in front of her, he was tall, and had rich black hair. When he started to speak Margaret's eyes welled up even fuller than before with tears of joy. She unlatched her tight grip from Frank and darted forward toward the man, crying she locked her arms around his thick neck. "Margaret, my daughter, its ok now, you're home!" Before she knew it the entire 4077****th**** was gathered around her welcoming her home. Hawkeye climbed his way onto a stack of wooden crates marked "Medical Supplies" and raised his hand for silence. As this attempt quickly failed Radar began to shout, "EVERYONE QUIET!" Hawkeye started to speak as he acknowledged Radars help with a nod. " Yank you Radar. I just wanted everyone to know that I am glad Margaret is safe and I especially missed her in OR but I think I speak for everyone when I say welcome home Margaret we missed you in everyway imaginable." The camp began to cheer and chant "Margaret…Margaret…Margaret" ******

**"Thank You everyone I am glad to be back. Now I want everyone to get back to work and pretend this never happened." As she talked her face turned from smiles and tears to a stern empty glare. The camp quickly exited to return to their daily tasks.******

****

**After a few hours of sleep, her body began to jump and twitch violently, when she finally had awoken her face and neck were covered in a cold sweat. It was the middle of the night and the moon was shinning brightly. Margaret grabbed hold of the nearest item able to support her weight and pulled herself to her feet. As she limped from one side of the room to the other she did not understand why she was in the small village of Koreans for when she thought about her recent dream, they called her Margaret and when she once again red the dog tags they too called her Margaret. She reasoned that this was her name but now she wondered if her dream could possibly give her anymore clues. As she continued to pace she caught her eye on the faded medical bag resting in the corner. When she made out the faint cross, she remembered the dream yet again knowing that it must have taken place at a MASH unit for why else would Hawkeye have said that he missed her in OR. If the dream was correct it would also explain why she had the medical bag in her jeep to begin with. The more Margaret paced and thought the more convinced she became that this was not her home. She carefully stepped over the sleeping children and made her way out the hut's cloth door. When she reached the fresh air she stumbled a few step further and fell. As she wiped the dirt form her battered face she noticed a new stream of blood streaming down her arm. After getting back to her feet she noticed the culprit of the cut was a broken mirror buried in the dirt. She managed to dig the broken mirror out of the hard ground and starring into it she began to notice that the Koreans had a different look to them. Sticking the broken mirror into her pocket She stumbled deciding that she would go for a walk to help her fall asleep. She had only wondered a few hundred feet form the hut when she stopped dead in her tracks. Listening very closely she heard foot steps getting closer. Frightened, her head snapped up and a dark shadow appeared before her. Then a voice yelled out, "MARGARET, YOU'RE ALIVE!" Margaret was so scared by the stranger that, like a wild animal, she wasted no time in darting off into the night sky, back toward the hut however the wounds to her legs prevented her from moving very fast. The stranger ran after her for a few minutes but soon gave up and headed back.******

****

**Back at the camp thing were going good, although everyone was still very sad at what had happened to Margaret. That is when Hawkeye came barging into Colonel Blake's office. "Pierce, don't you know how to knock?"******

**"No, I am only a doctor, what do you expect? Ask Frank, he went through obedience school."******

**"Well… what do you want."******

**"You see, last night I could not sleep, I was thinking about Hot Lips."******

**"Ahhhh, for pete sakes your disgusting!"******

**"No, Colonel not in that way, I was thinking about how much she meant to this camp. So, I decided that it would help if I went for a walk. I was standing, quietly at the edge of the camp where there was not much light."******

**"So?"******

**"So after a few minutes I started to hear noises and when I looked up I saw her!'******

**"Who?"******

**"Margaret."******

**"So where is she now?"******

**"Well…I shouted her name and she got this real scared, dear in the headlight look and took of running. I tried to catch her but she got away and I don't know where she went."******

**"Well, Pierce if she would not come to you then you must just be seeing things. Maybe it was just a frightened Korean kid or maybe you are just letting your mind get the best of you."******

**"No, Colonel, really I saw her!"******

**"Look if she did not come then it was not her. No matter what you think you saw Margaret is still dead and I am ordering you not to tell anyone else what you think you saw!"******

**"Colonel Blake, message form General Clayton." Radar said as Hawkeye rushed through the office doors on his way to the Swamp.******

**"What is it Radar?"******

**"Well sir, headquarters is sending down a new nurse to replace Major Houlihan, she will arrive early in the morning."******

**"What is her name?"******

**"Major Betty Jackson."******

**"Thanks Radar, that will be all." Colonel Blake said as his voice started to weaken.******

****

**            Radar carefully opened the mess tent door and stepped in only far enough to allow the door room to close behind him. Then he quickly scanned the room for some willing to talk to him. When his eyes reached the opposite end of the tent they settled on Hawkeye and Trapper sitting alone. Power walking over to them Radar asked, "Hey guys you got room for me?"******

**            "Sure Radar, pull up a seat just don't eat it first." Hawkeye said with sarcasm.******

**            "Geeeze, come on, I got news. Do you want to hear it or not?"******

**            "OK Radar what is it?"******

**            "We are all ready getting a new head nurse to replace Margaret."******

**            "Well Radar does she have a name?"******

**            "Oh yes she is a major and her name is Betty Jackson, she should be arriving any minute now." As Hawkeye continued to stab at his powdered eggs with a fork he started to get hot tempered, "You know what, I think Margaret is alive. I went for a walk a few nights ago and just as I reached the edge of camp I saw someone when I realized it was Margaret I yelled her name but she quickly turned and ran from me."******

**            "But Hawk don't you think had it been her she would have not ran away so quickly?" Radar questioned. Just then they heard tires screech and a jeep went sliding through the compound coming to a stop in front of the mess tent. Radar jumped up from his conversation and ran out to greet its passengers. "You must be Major Jackson." He said with some excitement. Reaching his hand out for her bags she began to speak, "Yes I am and I am guessing you are the company clerk. So what do they call ya?"******

**            "Uhh…well I go by Radar. Before you ask why it is because I seem to know what is going to happen before it does."******

**            "Really is that so. That is something I will have to see to believe."******

**            " Oh I think you will find plenty of interesting people here. Here let me show you your tent." He said as he grasp the finally shaped handle on the top of the worn suitcase. Slowly the diver then realizing he was no longer needed, let the clutch out and speed from the compound. As Radar and Betty reached her tent Radar offered her a tour around the compound. Along the way he pointed out all the important buildings such as Blake's office, the mess tent, and post-op.******

****

**            "Hey Trapper, did you ever get a chance to meet that new nurse? I am tellin' ya we don't need her. Margaret is alive." ******

**            "Well…Hawk I don't see how you can honestly believe she is alive. She would not have avoided seeing you if she was lost, cold, and or hungry. Hawkeye face the facts she gone." Trapper said as he poured from the nearly empty still. ******

**            " Ya know Trapper I guess you got a point. Maybe she is gone, I just never thought I would ever have to say good-bye this way." Just as Hawkeye leaned back in his cot, his eyes glazed over and he was staring off into space. "Sure Betty you can come in, you'll have to excuse Hawkeye he in his own little world as usual." Hawkeye's eyes then began to focus in on Betty. "Oh…sorry I did not see you come in. Please sit down and welcome to the SWAMP." ******

**            "Thank you Hawkeye, it is rather charming here."******

**            "Well thanks but you don't have to be polite, let's face it, this is the middle of a war."******

**            "Radar was giving me a tour and I just could not pass up the chance to come and meet you and Trapper."******

**            "So where you from?"******

**            "Texas. I have a husband and two children. John and Marleen."******

**            "Fantastic, I am from Maine."******

****

**ATTENTION ALL PERSONAL REPORT TO OR ON THE DOUBLE. INCOMMING WOUNDED.******

****

**            "Well Betty I guess we will  have to take this conversation with us." Hawkeye said as the three of them headed for the OR room. They wasted no time in finding the wounded which were coming in by helicopter, jeep, and bus. "Hawkeye I am glad that I ******

**finally get to see how you guys do it." ******

**            "Well it is not easy." He said as he escorted the new Major into post-op. She finished scrubbing up and joined the others in OR.  Peeking in before she entered the room she took each step with great care. She then noticed that the floor was covered in blood and now so was her shoe. When she finally drew closer to Hawkeye she peered over his shoulder and into the bloody American who seemed all but alive. The longer she watched the more her face turned ghostly white. Soon it was pale enough that it was impossible to tell where the mask stopped and her face began. Gravity took hold and she hit the floor like a bag of bricks. Klinger high stepped over her trying not to loose his balance or the tray of instruments that were firmly locked in the grips of his hands, "Holy Toledo." He said as his eyes grew big in disbelief. After a few minutes she started to awaked only she noticed that she was no longer in OR but rather in her own cot in her new tent. ******

****

**ATTENTION WOULD MAJOR JACKSON PLEASE REPORT TO COLONEL BLAKES OFFICE AT ONCE******

****

**She slowly drug her unbalanced body from the cot and made her way across the compound. When she entered the colonels office he was standing behind his desk waiting for her. "Yes colonel what is it?"******

**            "Well you see Major it seems that there it an orphanage a few miles up the road. Seeing as how you get a little squeamish at blood I thought you could take a days rest and make a visit to the orphanage for me."******

**            "Sounds great colonel. What must I do?"******

**            "When you get there I want you to tell them that they can come to the 4077****th**** and get medical treatment for the children."******

****

**As Margaret returned she wondered if maybe now she could get some sleep but once again it had failed for she could not get the stranger out of her mind. The next morning came and she was starting to get tired enough that she could sleep. That is when she overheard Major Jackson talking to the Korean in charge of the orphanage at which Margaret found herself. Soon after Margaret found herself helping load the young Korean children into an old farm truck. They road down the bumpy dirt packed road until they came upon the 4077****th****. Margaret was finally asleep in the bed of the truck. But soon she awoke to the sound of an off-key, squawking bugle. As she peeked up over the first rotted rail she could see the entire camp of soldiers aliened in perfect formation. They seemed to be crying. That is when colonel Blake began to speak, "We are all sad I know to have to say good-bye to Margaret but we must. We have a new nurse that we must now show the same love to even though it will never be the same around here. It was terrible how she had to go but such is war. I think we should put her to rest down." His voice broke up and the rest of the camp started crying harder. Margaret turned her eyes down to the beaten dog tags and realized that maybe now she was truly home. She scooted to the end of the truck bed and slid off the end onto the compounds rough surface. Dragging her feet across the dirt, clouds formed at her feet. As she came around the side of the parked truck the eyes of the camp grew wide in disbelief. Colonel Blake was the last to finally turn, "Margaret…Is that you? YOUR HOME ! YOUR ALIVE!" The camp raced up to her smothering in hugs. They were no longer tears of sadness but tears of joy.  ******

****


End file.
